Home > Japan, Reflections, Travel > my wings have grown

my wings have grown

thumbnail_2hofu12.jpgGathering pictures 
to present on my time in Japan,
I found a photo of myself
in front of the floating torii
of Miyajima

I was there. Of course
I remember my awe
standing before
that gate (between
the profane and
the sacred); still,
seeing myself
there inspired
a rush

That all really
happened! I didn’t
just dream it!

Miyajima

I searched my blog
to see if I’d ever written
about Miyajima. I found one
image, which showed up
twice

One of the two posts
cradling that image
sent another thrill
through me

Just a couple days ago,
I wrote here about my current job,
which I cherish

I described being kinda scared
when I started at the new place;
doing this meant
trading stability for
far less certainty

This morning,
looking for “Miyajima”
among my posts, I found
words that made my heart soar

Two years ago,
I feared failing in a
new landscape, but I did
not fear this so much
that I didn’t even
try

And so I sit here
in my PJs, smiling,
thinking how
good it is to
have risked …

and to feel
from here
just how strong
my wings have grown
from choosing to unshackle
myself from my old
self-imposed
leash and
instead
take to
the sky

miya scale.jpg

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  1. March 17, 2017 at 7:23 am

    Yeah, I don’t know if I would have been brave enough to live in a different world, especially on my own. That is a great picture.

    • March 18, 2017 at 4:31 am

      For me, this was actually a kind of running away. I had deep law school debt that had to be paid, but I loathed the thought of being trapped at a desk 9-5. Fleeing to Japan meant a less horrifying, scary path to me. I really grew up while alone in Japan, so that I loved my time there … but left no longer afraid of the possible futures that had sent me packing in the first place. For me, staying in the U.S. would have been the brave choice, but it was a choice that did increase my bravery in the end. 🙂

      • March 18, 2017 at 6:23 am

        I have already told you I wouldn’t have the nerve to go to Japan, I think it was a wise decision for you. I do think you have a good thing from running away.

        • March 18, 2017 at 6:25 am

          Understood. I just meant to say that, for me, bravery would have been the opposite of what it was for you. For me where I was then, running to Japan was the far less scary option … and so not very brave. 🙂

          • March 18, 2017 at 6:36 am

            I understood

          • March 18, 2017 at 6:39 am

            Phew. Based on your response, I thought I might’ve inadvertently ventured into the dread blog territory of implying, “We’re all similarly motivated and situated, so what’s right for me is right for everyone, and vice versa!” I’m glad that wasn’t so. Happy Saturday. ♥

  2. March 18, 2017 at 5:23 am

    So glad I finally found the time to return to your corner of cyberspace, Deborah.
    I’ve missed you.

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