Home > Family, Parenting > Weekend Coffee Share: De-coffee-nation

Weekend Coffee Share: De-coffee-nation

If we were having coffee today, I’d actually be drinking peppermint tea or sparkling water. I gave up coffee a week ago after a three-cup indulgence one day revealed just how anxious it makes me. When I gave it up, I felt like a weirdo to be so impacted by coffee, but I no longer feel that way after reading halfway through Caffeine Blues. It cites hundreds of studies showing detrimental impacts of coffee. Apparently, its initial citation list was 700 pages, but the author trimmed that down to about 300 so the book would feel more approachable!

I’d tell you that my stress levels are already greatly improved. I’m taking half as many bathroom trips. I’m sleeping better when I finally fall asleep, sleeping for four or five hours–not sixty or ninety minutes–straight in an initial burst before I awaken in the wee hours and find myself unable to fall back asleep. Based on a de-coffee-nation experiment earlier this year, it’ll be another week before I’m sleeping consistently straight through the night and waking up feeling refreshed.

When I awakened a few hours ago, I ended up writing five pages in my print journal. I haven’t written five pages in ages! My hand usually starts cramping around one page, growing to a steady, hostile ache until I stop writing by two pages. I’d written four pages by the time I realized I’d … written four pages, without incident. My brain flashed to some of the pain studies I’d recently read in Caffeine Blues and I wondered, incredulous, if maybe that’s another way coffee’s been impacting me without my knowing it.

(Despite the book’s title referencing caffeine, it cites numerous studies about ill effects from non-caffeine agents in coffee. I don’t want to say “caffeine” when I really do mean “coffee, a key concerning element of which is caffeine.” And I fully mean to indulge in my beloved caffeine-containing bacon chocolate here and there, so there will be a small place for caffeine-containing treats in my life!)

By the time I’d read 50 or so pages into the book, I was noticing how many people were walking around with cups of coffee perpetually in their hands. I zeroed in on each cup of coffee in each meeting I attended physically and found myself thinking of the horror-ish movie The Stuff. Its tagline? “Are you eating it, or is it eating you?”

I’d realize suddenly that I’d just spent ten minutes telling you about this one facet of life, apologize, and chuckle before moving on.

I’d tell you that my toddler, Littler J, will be turning two in a few weeks. I feel like I just brought him home, but his size and recently exploded vocabulary confirm that my internal calendar’s incorrect, not the external ones available everywhere.

I’d burst into a grin and tell you how proud Li’l D was to earn his first stripe at jiu-jitsu a few days ago. He’s having so much fun, and learning so much more than I expected! My primary reason for signing him up–apart from that he’d been asking for months–was hoping that he’d find the discipline and connection I once found in martial arts. Seeing him learn tangible things as well as intangible ones is pretty awesome; seeing him have fun doing it, even better!

He’s also taken to reading while walking, a fact that thrills this thirty-year veteran of reading while walking.


My husband will be working on a TV pilot in a couple of weeks. He’s been several months without steady work, so I was excited to learn it’s a “put pilot,” which means it’s the next best thing to a straight-to-show order. This might turn into his next full show, though that’d probably be some months out.

He’s got an exciting week coming up, but I’ll let him tell you about that! His last post actually began as a coffee share, but migrated away from that. I figure he’s due for another coffee share, then, to which he’ll almost certainly kid he’s ruining his every-other-month posting average. Hee.

I’ve almost three months into my new job, and guess what? I still love it. No, wait. That’s not enough emphasis. I. Still. Love. It! I have so much room to learn and grow, and be part of effecting change. And I barely have to look at software contracts! After almost a decade of working on software contracts, I am so glad they’re a peripheral instead of central job function now. You could probably tell that without my saying so, though, based on how I beam whenever I talk about this change.

I’d tell you that money thoughts creep into my brain at least every fifteen or twenty minutes, but that they feel less distressing now that I’m inching away from my daily cup or two of coffee.

I’m reminding myself to have faith. You don’t move from the first to the fifteenth rung on the ladder in one mighty leap. Rather, you focus on the second rung, and then the third, and then the fourth until you finally work your way up to the twentieth. My husband and I will pay off our enormous-to-us federal tax liability and deal with the fiscal ripples well once we’ve gotten to the appropriate rungs. Sweating it from the first rung frankly accomplishes little except to amp me up, which is not the kind of accomplishment I’m interested in accumulating.

Realizing how long I’d rambled on, I’d exclaim, “But there’s so much left to say after a month without coffee sharing!” I’d look for one final bit to share before thinking of an exchange yesterday and giggling while telling you about it.

Li’l D, who attends Catholic school, was watching videos about Jesus’s miracles. Peering over his shoulder at one point, I said, “You should know Jesus wasn’t blond-haired and blue-eyed. He would have had much darker skin, hair, and eye coloring than is depicted here!”

My husband chuckle-snorted behind me. I turned to see him shaking his head. “What?! He’s already shown he believes there’s a correlation between dark shades and bad things, so I want him to know that one of his very favorite things was probably pretty close to him in skin coloring.”

“I understand, honey,” he told me, still shaking his head. “But we can have that conversation later! He’s getting the key Jesus points now.”

“I think it’s good for him to have in the back of his mind now,” I countered, smiling at how Li’l D was so captivated by his video that he didn’t chime into our conversation at all. I’m not sure he was even aware of it! That’s focus.

I’d ask you what’s been up with you and, as always, no matter how much I’d rambled before, I’d listen with the goal of hearing as much as I can with what I understand about the world today.


  1. March 13, 2016 at 7:09 am

    Ok, so, chocolate BACON?!?!? Where have I been?!? What is it? Where can I get it?

    Also, thanks so much for posting more about your life without coffee. I’ve taken your words to heart and have cut down to one or two cups a day. And it really is harder that I thought! So well done on stickin’ to it!
    I’d write more about how I think you’re an amazing mama, what a great hubby and kids you have….but my mind keeps turning on me I go back to CHOCOLATE BACON!!!!

    • March 13, 2016 at 7:15 am

      YES! It’s by a company called Chuao, which makes chocolate I favor over any other kind I’ve ever had. But the bacon chocolate is in its own realm! They have some on Amazon, but it looks like you have to either buy a box or a three-pack with other chocolates … which, you know, is not the worst thing in the world. :p

      My only hesitation about going to Legoland last week was that they sell Chuao, and that I wasn’t sure I could stay strong in my 40-days-without-junk-food commitment with Chuao in line of sight. I stayed strong, knowing I can buy it just a couple miles away next time we have some kind of festivity planned … like, oh, J’s birthday!

      Last but not least, thank you so much for your kind words, which have warmed an already warm Sunday morning. I ♥ your words, and also your heart … even more than chocolate bacon!

      • March 13, 2016 at 7:21 am

        Awe *blushing* you are to kind love.
        My wee one turns 1 in a week so maybe an intro to bacon chocolate is order here! Hehe

  2. March 13, 2016 at 7:30 am

    Coffee makes me accept the world:-). Pretty sure it’s not the other way around since I am an energy bunny. Tea is my night time drink of choice. Hope everything works out great for hubby’s pilot. Love hubby’s reaction to kiddos Jesus moment. Tea up!

    • March 13, 2016 at 7:39 am

      Thank you for the well wishes! It’s with a company dear to my heart, so I’d love to see him working with that family-like clan for a long stint again. 🙂

  3. March 13, 2016 at 7:55 am

    Lovely post x I’m a tea addict – it makes me function 😊 good luck with job and hubby’s pilot x

  4. March 13, 2016 at 10:44 am

    Yes coffee is addict and I believe it has farther chemicals that are harmful. Best of luck to you both.

  5. March 13, 2016 at 11:41 am

    Congrats on de-coffee-nating. It’s hard to give up the things we love sometimes, but ultimately, the best thing. Good luck going forward! ~Tara

  6. March 13, 2016 at 11:57 am

    Reading while walking. Like mother, like son. 🙂

    I’m happy that you absolutely love your job. I hope you keep beaming. Until a short while ago I was giddy to go to work. Shortly before “it” happened, someone saw my passion and asked me to mentor them. It was an honor to be thought about in that way. It is now a delicate balance because one can’t fake passion.

  7. March 14, 2016 at 9:58 am

    I’m a huge coffee drinker, but I do half-caff now so I don’t get the shakes.

    I’m so glad your son is into Bible stories – things are beautifully simple at that age. My brother died at 35 when my youngest was 6. As we left the funeral I was sobbing and she tugged on my arm and said, impatient with all my grief, “Uncle Pat is happy in heaven with Jesus. I know that, and so should you.” I had to smile through the tears and say, “I know, but I’m still going to miss him.”

  8. March 14, 2016 at 1:34 pm

    Not into coffee, but bacon, chocolate and coke I love, love, love! (And fyi: I never knew bacon had caffeine in it!!) I’m glad your lil one is reading…just hope he learns to “look up” before walking into something or someone in the near future! :)p And I’m happy you still love your job….you’re at it for a good portion of you day. Nice to like what you do…. 🙂

  9. March 16, 2016 at 4:03 am

    As I sit here reading and grinning, I can’t help but think back to how much coffee I use to drink compared to what I drink now. It is strange, truly. I don’t think I intended to cut back it simply came about naturally over the course of life. My coffee though, it is my morning gift to myself and necessary to my humanity. ❤

    I love reading about lessons and learning. My eldest grandson is doing gymnastics and is I think learning the internal discipline he has lacked up till now. He is enthusiastic in his lessons, but more important he is working hard to achieve new things. It is important I think these young ones find passion early.

    My youngest just turned two last Sunday! I bought him a Elmo Guitar! Grandchildren are the very best revenge. ❤

    I loved. Loved. LOVED. You discussion on Jesus. Yes. Teach him now. From all the angels so he knows.

    So much more to say, but I am so happy I didn't miss this. As always your coffee shares are important. ❤

  1. July 3, 2016 at 8:29 am

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