Archive for March, 2016

Musical breadcrumbs

a relationship
with an older man
in college brought me
much heartbreak, but also
bruce springsteen

last week,
my husband
saw bruce perform
while my college self sulked
and my parent self thought,
“hey, this really ain’t
half bad”

a few days ago,
my husband pulled
a long, flat envelope
from our mailbox; inside
the envelope was a cd:
Read more…


39.5 days

I just wrote about how much I do not like proselytizing.
There’s a chance what I wrote below might come off as trying to sell you, but that’s not my intention.
I intend strictly, exclusively, to tell you why I feel so darn good at this exact moment in time,
in a way that doesn’t take me 408 hours to explain.

A few years ago, I changed my eating habits after a serious, months-long health scare following exposure to environmental toxins. Read more…

Categories: Health Tags: , , , , ,

Your comment, meet my trash can

Most comments on my blog are lovely: thoughtful, eloquent, empathetic. They’re so overwhelmingly lovely that it surprises me when I see the other kind, which I deposit directly in the trash.

What I consider “the other kind” expands beyond clear hate speech, generally falling into one or more of a handful of categories I call:

The Four Deadly P’s Read more…

thank you for

i gave up
coffee twelve-
point-some days ago,
not that i’m counting
or contemplating
ways to nab your
cuppa from you,
sleep is harder
to come by
than ever

(it’s a
short term
problem, but
it sure sucks
right now)

two nights ago,
i tried every


two hours of

… until … Read more…

tiny-armed hugs

i could have
gone to a

the boss!

i was born
to run!)

my college self
wept that her
parent self
took a

here’s the thing:
with two small kids,
some weekdays, the only
moments i truly get
to myself are
30 minutes
at lunch

is often filled: Read more…

Weekend Coffee Share: De-coffee-nation

If we were having coffee today, I’d actually be drinking peppermint tea or sparkling water. I gave up coffee a week ago after a three-cup indulgence one day revealed just how anxious it makes me. When I gave it up, I felt like a weirdo to be so impacted by coffee, but I no longer feel that way after reading halfway through Caffeine Blues. It cites hundreds of studies showing detrimental impacts of coffee. Apparently, its initial citation list was 700 pages, but the author trimmed that down to about 300 so the book would feel more approachable!

I’d tell you that my stress levels are already greatly improved. I’m taking half as many bathroom trips. I’m sleeping better when I finally fall asleep, sleeping for four or five hours–not sixty or ninety minutes–straight in an initial burst before I awaken in the wee hours and find myself unable to fall back asleep. Based on a de-coffee-nation experiment earlier this year, it’ll be another week before I’m sleeping consistently straight through the night and waking up feeling refreshed.

When I awakened a few hours ago, I ended up writing five pages in my print journal. I haven’t written five pages in ages! My hand usually starts cramping around one page, growing to a steady, hostile ache until I stop writing by two pages. I’d written four pages by the time I realized I’d … written four pages, without incident. My brain flashed to some of the pain studies I’d recently read in Caffeine Blues and I wondered, incredulous, if maybe that’s another way coffee’s been impacting me without my knowing it.

(Despite the book’s title referencing caffeine, it cites numerous studies about ill effects from non-caffeine agents in coffee. I don’t want to say “caffeine” when I really do mean “coffee, a key concerning element of which is caffeine.” And I fully mean to indulge in my beloved caffeine-containing bacon chocolate here and there, so there will be a small place for caffeine-containing treats in my life!) Read more…

The coffee need

On the first day of Lent, I committed to giving up the junk food that’s been my bane for the last many months. I usually eat junk food sparingly, but have been dosing it with myself most evenings since I wrote “my bulimia / my beautiful body” after my last Whole30.

“Junk food” means something different to me than it does to many people. For me, “junk food” is anything not listed on the Whole30 Autoimmune Protocol shopping list. It’s food that leaves me feeling crappier after eating it than I did before, whereas eating food on the list leaves me feeling better.

I usually feel like I’m swimming in rainbows a week or two into eating junk-free.

like this,

Like this, but with so many more rainbows

Not so this time. Read more…

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