Home > Nerd, Parenting, School > Thunder Thighs & a victory most malodorous

Thunder Thighs & a victory most malodorous

Victo Dolore’s recent post on sad times in school lunchrooms reminded me of my own like experiences. I was always one of the odd ones out. I remembered my mom’s like tales, too, and a post I’d written remembering those.

I think my mom–aka Thunder Thighs, my favorite superhero–would have loved its ending.

like my mom

Forever

A Victory Most Malodorous
September 10, 2015

Tonight, my older son asked me to tell him “the story about the cat and the dog.”

“Which story?” I asked him. “This isn’t ringing a bell. Could you give me a little more detail to remind me?”

“The one where the dog brings the cat milk.”

“Oh! Bud and Tanzie!” My story. I happily told him the story again.

“Could you tell me another story?” he asked sleepily after I finished reminding him about Bud and Tanzie.

“Sure.” I searched my brain for a moment before beginning:

Once upon a time,
there was a superhero named Thunder Thighs.
She tried to sit at a table with the other superheroes,
but they didn’t like how much she burped and farted,
or how her underarms smelled like baby throw-up
in a baby’s poopy diaper!

But, one day,
a super-villain came to town.
He was so super that he took over the whole town,
and defeated all the superheroes, except Thunder Thighs,
who was still moping to The Decemberists after
being excluded for her smelliness.

When she realized there was no one else
left who could possibly save the day,
she went to fight the villain.

She quickly discovered
that his single vulnerability
was a sensitivity to grotesque smells.

“Get away! Get a–” he shrieked
when he smelled her, before passing out
while gasping for a breath
of unstinky air.

Thunder Thighs cuffed him
and dragged him to the authorities,
who made sure he was forever surrounded
by terrificially stinky smells.

And Thunder Thighs,
well, she was forever after welcome
to sit wherever the heck she wanted.

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  1. November 16, 2015 at 4:19 pm

    Good for thunder Thighs!

    • November 16, 2015 at 4:59 pm

      I’m grateful my mom left me with such good spur-of-the-moment story fodder for her grandkids. 🙂

  2. November 16, 2015 at 4:48 pm

    I am liking this heroine quite a lot. Thunder Thighs does sound like a super power! 🙂 Thank you so much for the mention.

    • November 16, 2015 at 5:05 pm

      I was surprised when a childhood friend of Mom’s wrote me once.

      First, she’d had a friend–yes! Second, I learned that the basis for Thunder Thighs existed long before that particular thigh-shockwave superpower joined the group.

      Mom had dreamed up her atypical superhero as a girl, and adapted the hero to her own post-baby self. It’s a delight to have that little bit of my mom’s history, which I’d never have had but for that childhood friend who found this blog … and to whom, I’m now realizing, I owe a much belated letter, in addition to the short “thank you!” I then sent.

      Thank you for making the world less lonely. 🙂

  3. November 16, 2015 at 7:16 pm

    That’s cute! Good job! 🙂

    • November 16, 2015 at 7:28 pm

      Thanks! I wonder if I could do a Thunder Thighs crossover with the ongoing story I’m now telling Li’l D?

      Either way, I love how these bedtime stories give me a chance to connect and create, a little, all at once. 🙂

      • November 16, 2015 at 7:30 pm

        Creative outlets for a creative mind!

  4. November 17, 2015 at 8:53 am

    You need to know you are one of my favorites. I always look forward to reading your thoughts.

  5. November 18, 2015 at 3:32 pm

    This is funny. Thanks for sharing.

  1. March 5, 2016 at 7:10 am
  2. February 10, 2017 at 4:02 am

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