Home > Family, Love > Weekend Coffee Share: My sister’s lovely snores

Weekend Coffee Share: My sister’s lovely snores

If we were having coffee, I’d ask you why you were out and about so late. I’d explain that I’ve only slipped out briefly while my younger sister, Rache (aka “Silver Star“), sleeps on my couch. She’ll be headed back home almost as soon as she arrived, but the quickness of her trip doesn’t change the warmth left in its wake. Home feels even more like home when filled by traces of certain loved ones’ presence, I’d say with the hint of a smile, already looking forward to hearing my sister’s snores for a few more hours.

I’d tell you how we didn’t do much, and about how very perfect was our laziness. I’d say we slept only in alternating fits on Friday nights, talking through most of Unfriended and Cinderella, and laugh when saying I made it through only ten minutes of Avengers: Age of Ultron before taking a late-night nap. Me, sleep through a superhero movie and stay awake for Cinderella?! I wouldn’t have believed it myself, had I not been there, done that!

I’d tell you that the best part of Saturday was a late afternoon walk while my husband watched our kids. As the sun went down, Rache and I spent 40 minutes wandering my neighborhood discussing boundaries, family, and the Bible viewed academically.

(I’ll feel Rache when I walk the neighborhood for weeks to come, I’d interrupt myself with a smile. It’s like that with sisters such as us, where we weathered childhood turbulence by finding strength and comfort in togetherness.)

She read stories to my boys afterward. My younger boy so loves his finger puppet penguin book!

I’d share a picture and say that’s enough about my visit with Rache.

readimus rachimus

I’d pause and mull over how much to share about anything else.

I’d say the week was a taxing one, but also lovely.

I’d say I sank bunches of time into one distressing and one delightful thing last week, but that I don’t want to talk much about either for fear of jinxing precarious, positive outcomes I perceive possible for each. Maybe I’ll feel comfortable saying more next week, or the week after?

(I’m already drawing illustrations for a related post with my brain, but there’s little time to get such things down by hand in the hubbub of these weekdays. My husband‘s currently working on a new-to-him kind of show, which means longer hours away and more for me to manage solo at home before falling into bed beat after the older one’s snoring each evening. It could be a day, a week, or a month before I translate internal images to external ones so crummy you’ll likely wonder how they took me so long to create.)

I’d tell you that’s all I’ve got for now, and listen intently as you tell me about your week. I’d answer a smidge fewer than usual questions before stepping out into darkness, sweet darkness, and finding my way back to my sister’s snores.

Who knows how long it’ll be until I hear those snores again? I, not knowing, mean to savor each one left for now.


  1. November 8, 2015 at 4:42 am

    Morning coffee hand. I’m with you.

    • November 8, 2015 at 4:51 am

      I have a cup of coffee close by. It’s got an image of perky My Little Pony Pinkie Pie on it. I would need about eighteen cups of coffee to feel Pinkie Pie-esque right now … but happiness lingers as Rache murmurs to J things like, “Thanks for bringing me my shoes!” in between bouts of dozing. 🙂

      • November 8, 2015 at 6:33 am

        My husband’s cousin comes to spend the weekend once every few months. She’s a NYC woman, but the hustle and chaos of the city overwhelms her sometimes, and when she comes to visit, she mostly sleeps. But that’s ok with us – it’s what she needs, and we are happy to give her a peaceful weekend .

  2. November 8, 2015 at 4:46 am

    If we met for coffee, I’d share with you why I am up early thinking about what I hope is the toughest week of my parenting life (if it is, I will be grateful). Last Wednesday night and Thursday morning (Oct. 28 – 29), I spoke with my son, and frightened for his wellness, flew out to Tucson the next morning. It turns out, my very happy University of Arizona freshman had been having a tough time at school. His love for the Tucson terrain and air, the university’s campus and social life, the slower (than east coast) way of life, and new west coast friends were not enough. His inability to focus on academics while feeling stressed about where it all leads overwhelmed him. It turns out, he is not satisfied being the typical freshman who is undecided about his major and future plans. He could not justify accruing college debt, asking the same of me, while unsure of how he would pay back the loans. And, he could not enjoy the introductory, general education classes that most college students “get through.” He wanted to find intellectually stimulating classes right away! To deal with these conflicting feelings, he took advantage of the great opportunity surrounding him, drugs. The drug he began to depend on is the one that is increasing its legal status and is so often purported to be non-addictive, marijuana. Sure, it might have little chance of being physiologically addictive, but, for some people, it is. And, for many, it is psychologically addictive, especially when being used to self-medicate for anxiety, depression, etc. And, since one thing can lead to another, it is especially dangerous when synthetic marijuana, (Spice/K2) is substituted, especially without knowing. Those who smoke spice risk major and long-lasting or potentially permanent and lethal consequences. After a harrowing few days and with the crucial and selfless help of my sister’s husband as well as medical help, my son recovered enough to take a leave from school and recoup at home, with me. I am grateful that he is fine physically and will have no permanent problems, just some emotional scars that will fade into, I believe, tremendous marks of growth. During this next stage, what should have been planned as a “gap” year, and with a continued soaking of love and support from family, my sweet son, will create the path that he should be on!

    So, that was my week and the “coffee” discussion I’ll keep here. As quick as I was to post the typical “dropoff at college” photos on Facebook and Instagram, I will be keeping this twist of life’s journey a bit quieter. My closest family and friend circle already know and I will an abbreviated version as necessary, as I run into the many acquaintances who will wonder what happened/why my son is back in town! For now, as much as it seemed he “should” be away at college, I am grateful that he is home and already seeking his very healthy next adventure.

    • November 8, 2015 at 4:56 am

      Oh, man. I’m so glad he’s OK and that–thanks to your presence and support–he’ll continue to be that way.

      I’m reminded how I was so intent on accomplishing things early up through college. If I didn’t get there quicker than others, what was even the point?! In college, I realized that getting there at all (and enjoying the journey as much as possible along the way) was the point.

      I suspect time to consider and build will be a great and grounding thing, one that makes the next chapter–whatever it is–well timed. Most of all, I come back again to thanks he is okay. May good things be in store for you both. ♥

      • November 8, 2015 at 7:04 am

        Thank you- and I am sure you’re right. It is amazing how many twists and turns we each make! XO

  3. November 8, 2015 at 6:12 am

    Glad to hear your husband has some new work. Sounds like you’ll be doing double duty in the parenting department for awhile though. Best of luck with things. Guess that just means extra hugs for you. 🙂

    • November 10, 2015 at 2:45 am

      … and that in addition to a little of that much needed alone time after the little ones are in bed! I may use it for chores, but I cherish it all the same, even while looking forward to A’s future return to only a couple of long days a week! 🙂

  4. November 8, 2015 at 10:56 am

    Love that your sister will be walking in your heart with you. Smiling at the comforting snores.
    Here? My partner is due back in a day or two, and the house will feel full again.
    Savouring my quiet times, looking forward to his return.

    • November 14, 2015 at 10:25 am

      It looks like I’ll be seeing her again before too long, which warms my heart further … as does knowing your partner is back with you again. ♥

  5. November 8, 2015 at 1:26 pm

    I’ve always wished I had a sister. I love my brothers very much, and my visits with my eldest brother are a lot like the ones you describe with your sister—but I’ve always wished I weren’t the only girl. At least I have a good friend who pretty much suffices. 😀

    • November 14, 2015 at 10:28 am

      I’m so glad to have had sisters, though it took me a little while to appreciate it fully. The youngest was like an alien to me growing up due to the seven years between us. It was only when she visited me during my first year of law school and we bonded over the LotR movies that I realized how doubly lucky I was.

      With two sisters and one brother, I suspect my brother wishes he’d had a brother! I’d wager the wishing weakened a little after we stopped dressing and making him up.

      • November 15, 2015 at 1:39 pm

        haha! There is a big age gap between my siblings and I, so I understand. My oldest brother is 12 years my senior, and our other brother is 8 years my senior. It’s only as adults that I’ve been able to have a strong relationship with my oldest brother

  6. November 8, 2015 at 7:14 pm

    I’m glad you had such a wonderful visit with your sister. There is a special bond between people who have know each other since their beginning. I’m fortunate that my sisters both live in nearby towns so we see each other often although because of that, we’ve never gotten to have a sleep over! It sounds like so much fun that I think maybe we should plan one!

  7. November 9, 2015 at 12:06 pm

    Spending time with sisters is priceless. I’m lucky as both of mine live in the next town over. Within 10 minutes I’m with one and add another 5, I’m with the other one. The only time we’ve had sleep-overs is when we’ve gone up to my mother’s for a special occasion (leaving our kids – all 8 of them – behind!)

  8. November 9, 2015 at 12:34 pm

    Through your beautiful writing I felt the warmth you felt with your sister’s visit. I know what you mean.

  9. November 10, 2015 at 8:14 am

    How wonderful that you got together. I’m trying to talk one of my sisters into making the long trek to my place this weekend – you’ve inspired me to renew my efforts.

    Love that picture!

    • November 10, 2015 at 10:34 am

      I hope she gets in board! It does the soul good to be so close for more than an hour or two. Indeed, as we drove around, I found myself wondering aloud if it wasn’t “night talk” with our friend Darth that cinched her as a sister of my heart. Night and day conversation are so different; to be able to share both is a delight best not left to childhood. ♡

  10. November 10, 2015 at 3:02 pm

    Right there with you with everything (except the snores!) 🙂

    • November 11, 2015 at 10:20 am

      Since coming from rural Japan, where I often felt desperate for unrecorded sounds of life, I *love* the sound of snoring … most the time! Last night was my once annual night where it bugs me enough to remove myself to the sofa!

  1. November 14, 2015 at 9:17 am

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