Home > Education, Love, Parenting, Reflections > My big-little graduate

My big-little graduate

Tomorrow my son graduates from kindergarten.

So what? shouts the contingency who snap and share photos of their every restaurant meal. It’s not like there won’t be another half-dozen graduations in his future!

To them I say: It’s not like you won’t eat another couple of meals out tomorrow and share all those pics then, without pride of agency. You share that which you obtained only by money. I share that which I’ve helped shape by love, sweat, tears, pain, focus and dedication, day in and day out. How is it less acceptable for me to proudly–frequently–reflect on the vast and beautiful changes in this little boy who’s been my heart outside my body for most of six years?

Tomorrow, my big-little boy will don a little blue robe, and I will weep. It won’t matter how anyone else feels about the merits of kindergarten graduation.


I will weep.

I will remember the first letter I heard Li’l D say.

The first time I heard him say several letters in a row, before hearing him sing the whole alphabet song.

Soon enough, he’d color in letters, and then turn to scrawling his own. He’d expand them into writing first his name, and then sight words, and then words he tried to spell out by sound.

We'll always have Mexico!

We’ll always have Mexico!

There’ll be many more firsts by his next graduation. But for this one, “only” his kindergarten graduation, I will be thinking of the thousand firsts I’ve already witnessed. Of how the tiny baby I brought home is now such a big boy. What does it matter now that he’ll be bigger someday? That he’ll someday graduate from higher grades? For now, he is this big, and it is huge.


He started so very small.

Tomorrow I will applaud him for all the effort he’s poured into learning. I’ll cheer him on as he takes more steps toward an adulthood I hope will be filled with joy, love and loving conviction expressed in daily life and work.

I’ll applaud myself for weathering the highs and lows of learning to care for a human being who’s a little different every day. It’s tough to continuously make adjustments, only to realize what (finally) worked reasoning with him yesterday no longer works today.

I’ll applaud his skilled, compassionate teacher, whose conviction that all students are good students no matter how differently they learn has been a gift equally to Li’l D and to me.

I will thank all that is holy in this universe for the opportunity to be there, teary eyes, sniffles and all, and tonight?

Tonight I will go to bed smiling, and those smiles will be just as truthful as the tears between my lashes.

So much love for my big- little boy and his lovely "Teacher Mommy"

So much love for my big-little boy and his lovely “Teacher Mommy”

  1. June 25, 2015 at 10:04 pm

    I remember mom was really upset that for some reason she couldn’t attend my fifth grade graduation. She sent you in her sted. I was sad mom couldn’t come, but happy/proud to have my big sis there!

  2. June 25, 2015 at 10:05 pm

    He’s done one of those growing-up-jumps just lately, hasn’t he? You know – where you put a baby to bed and the next day when they wake there’s somebody with a whole different face and way of carrying themselves.

    • June 25, 2015 at 10:07 pm

      YES. We laid down one little boy on Friday/Saturday and woke up to a distinctly different one the next morning. It’s occasionally frustrating (“But we just bought those shoes!”) and also amazing. 🙂

  3. simoneterblanche
    June 25, 2015 at 11:53 pm

    Reblogged this on simi's mind and commented:
    So nice to see love for your son. I want to be a mother like you in the near future. This inspired me

  4. Deb
    June 26, 2015 at 5:10 am

    Congratulations to Lil D, and mom, and family 🙂

  5. June 26, 2015 at 5:35 am

    And you should celebrate and laugh and cry and hug and smile, it’s an amazing accomplishment and deserves all of the attention in the world! Congratulations to him, you and all of the other graduates!

    • June 26, 2015 at 7:27 am

      I did’t even make it out the school doors this morning before teats commenced. It is gonna be hard to say goodbye to two wonderful years of Miss A! D spent the whole drive telling me how sad it made him, even if he does have two more months of summer with her.

      • June 26, 2015 at 4:37 pm

        He was so fortunate to have her for two years! But I saw that his melancholy is starting to disapate! I just love that time of their life!

  6. June 26, 2015 at 5:56 am

    Kindergarten is such a special year. As a mom of a rising 1st grader (how did that happen?), I truly enjoyed reading your post !

  7. June 26, 2015 at 6:51 am

    Congratulations and enjoy his accomplishments!

  8. June 26, 2015 at 10:21 am

    Way to go Lil D and weep away momma! Those moments only come around one time and they are there to be celebrated and embraced. You should be proud of not only your sweet son and his accomplishments but your part in his success.
    Hugs! Enjoy the day.

    • June 27, 2015 at 8:24 am

      I managed to make it through without weeping (!), mostly because D was so goshdarned adorable in all his gravitas. He wore his cap and gown long after the other kids had taken theirs off.

      When I got in the car afterward, I checked my mail and found a picture from his teacher. Then, there in the car with my big boy off at grandmas’ house, I cried. I cried most the way home, until I caught up with Anthony and made finger hearts for him to see in his rear-view mirror. He returned them and I felt so light of heart.

  9. NotAPunkRocker
    June 26, 2015 at 12:18 pm

    Congrats to him (and for you for getting through it!)!! I love his smile in the first pic especially, serious and sweet 🙂

    • June 27, 2015 at 8:26 am

      I love that smile, too. He really is a serious soul, so that I sometimes forget he’s only five … and that his wisdom in certain regards ought not have me forgetting that! ♥

  10. June 26, 2015 at 12:52 pm

    Ignore the haters! If you want to celebrate this milestone, do so with abandon. Your little one and his educational journey deserves to be cheered! (I’ll be doing so from afar. Great work, Lil D!)

    • June 27, 2015 at 8:26 am

      Thank you! I’m getting something in my eyes all over again this morning. Such joy both now, and possible in what’s ahead. ♥

  11. June 26, 2015 at 4:49 pm

    Celebrate every milestone, they are important!

  12. June 27, 2015 at 5:26 pm

    Congralations, momma! I cried when both of mine graduated kindergarten, because it is a milestone.

    • July 2, 2015 at 8:19 pm

      Thanks, Peg! ♥ I made it through the ceremony itself smiling (good mom conversation, there), only to get in my car, see a pic his teacher of snapped in him in his cap and gown, and promptly started weeping. Such love in the picture! Such joy reflected as he smiled at one lovely, committed, talented teacher.

  13. July 8, 2015 at 5:06 am

    Reblogged this on meteorshower516 and commented:
    Everyone will have so many first times in their one and only lives. Appreciate all those first times. As a graduate from kindergarten for so many years , I still can’t forget my first graduation ceremony.

  1. August 20, 2015 at 6:57 pm
  2. December 26, 2015 at 2:12 am

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