Home > Education, Family, Health > My favorite future doctor

My favorite future doctor

Thanksgiving was lovely, but an 1,800-mile round trip drive took its toll on my family.

A la Lilo's "badness level" gauge

A la Lilo’s “badness level” gauge

I expect it will be a few days before we’re back into the swing of things here, with grumpiness levels closer to our individual norms.

family1 usual

Little is impacting my mood for the better right now. In fact, I’ve found just one thing that makes the corners of my mouth twitch upward the last day or so: the thought of an interview happening this Friday.

Rest assured it’s not my own interview. Momentary grumpiness aside, I’m good where I’m at. Rather, this Friday, a medical school will have the opportunity to interview my brother-in-law for admission to its next entering class.

I’m not in a hopeful sort of place right now, but the way I see it, “hope” doesn’t even factor in to this. It comes down to sense, plain and simple.

If the school is paying attention, it will see my brother-in-law for who he is:

  • Scholar
  • Impassioned advocate
  • Exceptional practical problem solver
  • Possessor of practically superhuman stamina, useful for residency and beyond
  • Diligent practitioner of compassion, not just when it’s easy, but always, regardless of wealth, familiarity, or mental health
  • Most importantly, a healer. This has been the case as long as I have known him. His loving words and actions have increased my family’s emotional health since he started dating my sister seventeen years ago. His unflinching tenderness and understanding in my mom’s scary, delusion-filled final days made those days more bearable for my mom and each of her children by birth

I recognize that his interviewers can’t see each of the countless moments of love, strength, courage and compassion I have witnessed from him over the years we have journeyed together. I don’t really think they need to.

All they need to do is watch.

He will gain medical knowledge. He already solves problems, cares and heals. Each of these things is implicitly part of who he is, how he expresses himself, the way he relates to others.

What can be trained, he will learn. What cannot be trained, he already possesses and uses daily. It shows, no matter how brief the transaction.

I know he’s nervous. I get that. The stakes are high for him.

But though the school might not yet understand it, the stakes are even higher for it. Its representatives’ seeing–really seeing–will either enable a natural healer to expand his capabilities sooner, bringing great benefit to many, or it will not. It will either recognize a present and future leader and forever be the school that trained him, or it will not.

I am realistic about my loved ones’ strengths and weaknesses. This is why many friends only ever request my essay revision assistance once.

Here I am led not by my heart but by my head, which recognizes enormous strengths well suited their calling. No matter how grumpy my heart, my head informs me it would be nearly impossible for interviewers not to see that my brother-in-law’s excellent on-paper credentials are bested only by his off-paper ones.

My bet is on them seeing. And that? Well, that, my friends, is reason enough for me to stop breathing fire–for at least a few moments–on even my grumpiest day.

firebreather pause

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Categories: Education, Family, Health Tags: , ,
  1. December 3, 2013 at 5:52 am

    This is wonderful! Based on your testimony to your Brother-in-law, there is no doubt in my mind that he will do absolutely amazing with his interview and be accepted into the class!

    On another not: I cant say I have ever met a pregnant woman that doesn’t breathe fire more often than not. Going from zero to 10 in .5 seconds at the drop of a hat seems to be the norm! Just know that you and your family will forever be in my heart and thoughts and maybe…just maybe one day our paths will cross. And for that I remain hopeful and thankful that you have come into my life, even though for now it is through your blog. 🙂

    • December 4, 2013 at 5:41 am

      ♥ I get excited every time I see your name in comment, and this is why! I too hope we have a chance to meet someday.

      I’ve been pretty good with limiting my firebreathing, but part of that is definitely having a couple of understanding colleagues who let me blow off steam and then move along. 🙂

      • December 4, 2013 at 6:02 am

        I get excited every time you post a new blog. Its like a little window into your world. 🙂 ♡♥

  2. December 3, 2013 at 5:58 am

    LOL re “don’t look at me in that tone of voice!” ❤

  3. December 3, 2013 at 9:23 am

    I love the grumpiness level thing. Mine fluctuates hourly. lol

    • December 4, 2013 at 5:42 am

      Mine tends to be pretty constant, but there are definitely times where fluctuation can be by the minute! 😀

  4. December 3, 2013 at 11:58 am

    Oh, those graphics! I love them so much. I’ll keep him in my thoughts for a successful interview. Maybe you could send him with this post?

    • December 4, 2013 at 5:44 am

      Thanks, Rivki! I always like to make sure those I’m posting about are OK with what I’m posting, so I sent this to him after I wrote it for his go-ahead to post. He gave the go-ahead and said it gave him a boost, so yay, that. ♥

  5. December 3, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    Such a lovely tribute. Thank you. We should acknowledge the positive a whole lot more. And when I say we, I mean I.

    • December 4, 2013 at 5:47 am

      I’m usually pretty good about acknowledging the positive, but it can get a little challenging during pregnancy. Doing this was a great reminder how much better it feels to build someone up than be overtly grumpy, so hopefully I’ll act on that!

      I did read this post by Rivki yesterday that was another excellent reminder. Its topic is disappointment, but its tools are useful for addressing a whole range of uncomfortable emotion. I’m going to try holding that close to heart, too!

  6. Koa
    December 3, 2013 at 1:18 pm

    I could tell in just one meeting that he was one of the good ones. I will be wishing him lots of luck this week, because clearly from your testimony luck is the only thing he needs – the skills are there.

    • December 4, 2013 at 5:55 am

      Sometimes he can be a little crass and that can be a little blinding as to his magnificent other traits, but he’s gotten really good at gauging when crassness is and is not a good idea. Also, his crassometer has gone done some since becoming a dad. :p

      He definitely has the skills, so like you (thank you!), I’m now just wishing him luck. Also that I could speed up time just a little, so he could get through the interview and tell me how he feels about it. But . . . I’m patient. Yeah, that’s right. Ahem.

  7. December 4, 2013 at 1:00 pm

    Off topic …. Thought I spend a few spare minutes to thank you for stopping by to deliver best wishes during our tough time. Many thanks!!!!

    • December 7, 2013 at 2:38 am

      I’ve read several of your posts recently, but I’ve gotten crummier at thinking of something to say in response to most posts I read. So I lurk quietly and wonder, “Will I ever get back to mad commenting again?” Perhaps! I miss the exchanges. 🙂

      • December 7, 2013 at 4:43 am

        I understand … please remember you are always welcome. … and I will return to my regular schedule after the weekend.

  8. December 4, 2013 at 5:47 pm

    What an exciting and frightening experience all at once! I went through the grueling process a few years back of MCAT, applications, interviews.

    A great support system was/is/will be invaluable to myself through the bad quiz days, the bad hair days. Your brother-in-law seems to be surrounded by good people such as yourself!

    • December 7, 2013 at 2:41 am

      I thought I wanted to go to medical school for some years, way back when. I determined I didn’t have the fortitude. I have it now, but my heart’s taken me somewhat different directions. It’s exciting to see him pursuing this passion with such vigor.

      He applied last year but didn’t have enough shadowing experience; unfortunately, his university recommended volunteer experiences that had nothing to do with shadowing. This means he’s put in a ton of shadowing time the last year, which has only enhanced his excitement for his future profession. I hope that with that change between last year and this, it’s that much nearer in the future! I look forward to being part of his support system through the wildness, if only from afar. 🙂

      • December 7, 2013 at 6:55 am

        Ah, about the fortitude part, I assumed strength would simply come to me when the time came (not a good strategy!) But my faith and family really helped me through the first year. Some days of studying feel triumphant while others not so much. I try to see this as an *opportunity* as your post highlights.

        P.S. shadowing is so key!

  9. December 5, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    Good luck to him!

  10. May 14, 2014 at 9:09 am

    Unless something wild happens, it looks like he’ll be going to his first choice school!

    I hope my next post is a woo-hoo for him. 🙂

  1. May 30, 2014 at 10:24 am

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